Birth, Death and a Book

This weekend my thoughts swung between birth and death and what's in between. My family celebrated my Grandpa's 90th birthday and I finished the book The Goldfinch. 

The Goldfinch is the best book I've read in a very long time. I felt it after a few chapters, but it was Chapter 12 that punched me in the gut:

That life—whatever else it is—is short. That fate is cruel but maybe not random. That Nature (meaning Death) always wins but that doesn’t mean we have to bow and grovel to it. That maybe even if we're not always so glad to be here, it’s our task to immerse ourselves anyway: wade straight through it, right through the cesspool, while keeping eyes and hearts open. And in the midst of our dying, as we rise from the organic and sink back ignominiously into the organic, it is a glory and a privilege to love what Death doesn’t touch.

When saying goodbye to my Grandma (also 90 years old) she whispered to me:

"It's just not your time."

I assumed she was talking about love and not death. To her my 36 is young. Although I don't always feel that way I chose to believe her.

We cannot control how much time we have here. We can control how we spend it. Read this book now and don't stop. Love people and things around you as hard as you can and don't stop. 

Even Birthday Cat Can't Believe I'm 34

Somehow according to basic math, being born in the year 1978 means I'm 34 today.

I've always been fascinated by horoscopes. I like to ask people their signs (in a non-creepy way, I think) and see if they adhere to the typical characteristics of that sign.  I'm Cancer the crab...and some traits of typical Cancers are so right on it hurts.

Although less so in my old age, I can be moody and definitely love my alone time. I'm good with money, I have a good memory, I'm fascinated by the occult, and I prefer a career that involves helping people. I also have a seriously weak digestive system, don't worry I'll spare you the details, but let's just say traveling with me in developing countries can be a real adventure.

However, most importantly - like a real crab with a hard outside shell, but a soft inside -  I'm emotional, caring, sensitive, kind, nurturing, but I keep these all hidden behind an air of indifference and aloofness (Hello. I have an anonymous blog). Truth.

Since I usually ask my dates when their birthdays are I've done a lot of thinking about which signs I'm more compatible with. My two most significant ex-boyfriends were a Taurus (my first love and currently my good friend) and a Sagittarius (the one who ran away, who I never speak to). Other men in my life who have seriously influenced me also fall into one of these two signs. Weird.

According to various very scientific astrology sites, Cancer is compatible with Taurus but NOT with Sagittarius. Huh.

Cancer/Taurus

This is a match that may get off to a slow start, but stays together for the long haul.  Both

lovers of the cozy cave; both crave stability; loyal and long-term minded; builders of material comforts; wealth-oriented -- creating abundance; sensuality meets emotional potency; family-oriented.

Cancer/Sagittarius 

These two signs couldn't be more opposite. Sag craves adventure and will constantly be on the go, while Cancer prefers the quieter domesticated life. Cancer needs to feel emotionally secure. (Had I read this before my ex and I got together I may not have been that shocked when he ran out the door when we tried to make a plan to live together.)

There you have it! OkCupid should have everyone's actual birthday on their profiles so we can all save ourselves a little time and a lot of heartache.

Now I'm off to Connecticut to celebrate my birthday by eating some soft shell crabs, lobster rolls and ice cream. The Tums are packed.

Do you have any interesting dating experiences with certain signs? Or do you think it's all bullshit?

I'm Happiest Right Now

According to the Brits who took

this survey

I'm the happiest I've ever been right now. I'm 33. 

I'm secure in my professional skills and I know that I bring value to my company. I'm confident in my dating life and comfortable being single. I'm having the time of my life doing Improv, meeting new people and trying new things like rock climbing. I can afford to take amazing trips outside the country. I buy more expensive shoes. 

I don't give a flying shit about what anyone thinks about me. I know who I am and I'm not going to change who I am for anyone.

Sure, I sometimes wish for more money, my own apartment and a sexy man-friend, but after 9 months into

age 33

I completely agree. I'm happy - really happy! And I'm not afraid to shout this out to anyone who'll listen (you).

Does anyone else feel this way? Shout it out in the comments!